It was a Saturday afternoon when I walked into my new home, an empty, shabby apartment block in the West Village.
It was dark out, so I was looking for a spot to set up the apartment for the night.
The only light was the moon and the city’s neon sign on the roof.
I set up my laptop and sat in the kitchen with a glass of water, and my roommate, whom I’d known since we were teenagers, sat at a table across the room.
I opened the door and went into the apartment, which was tiny, with no furniture, a small kitchen, and a couch in the corner.
After a few minutes of settling into the cramped space, my roommate said, “We need a place to chill.”
So I set out to find a place for us to stay.
I was going to be renting the apartment and living alone.
The rent was $1,200 a month, but since I’d signed a lease, I was going up against an offer from an apartment manager that could be as low as $1 a night.
But I didn’t want to leave my boyfriend, who’d promised to keep me company while I was there, behind.
I’d found a way to keep my life separate.
It felt so good to be separate.
I walked in and saw my roommate curled up on the couch, watching television with a bottle of wine in hand.
He was getting into the mood for some serious conversation.
“I’m trying to think of a great place to hang out,” I said.
My roommate and I spent the next couple of hours discussing ideas, and I realized I’d never had the chance to hang with my boyfriend.
I was nervous.
We’d both been together for a year and a half and had two young kids together.
It would be awkward to have a date in New York, which is where we grew up.
So I was like, What do I do?
But when I told him that I was pregnant, he was like Oh, honey, I’m going to have to think about it.
I’m sure I can find some great spots to hang.
I knew we weren’t in Manhattan, but it was easy to feel like I’d missed out.
I started to make my way to a nearby bar to catch up with some of my friends.
As we were walking to the bar, I started asking my roommate if he wanted to have dinner.
I wanted to hang around with my friends and make some friends, but I also wanted to be able to spend time with my baby.
He said no.
I just wanted to go back home.
A few days later, my boyfriend and I were still having dinner, but he wasn’t showing up.
I asked him why.
He said he couldn’t be home with his newborn baby.
When I asked what that meant, he just shrugged and said, I’ll see you later.
But I knew something was wrong when he didn’t show up on our anniversary.
When we woke up on New Year’s Day, we found out he’d gone to Europe to see his girlfriend.
I texted my roommate to see if I could talk to him about how we could move to a different city.
When I finally got a response from him, he told me to call him back when he was in the United States.
I called him a few hours later and he was back at my place in Brooklyn.
We had a wonderful night, but we didn’t make it to my apartment.
There was nothing we could do.
He’d already made up his mind that we weren`t going to move.
I couldn`t believe it.
After months of trying, I had no idea what to do.
Even as we were trying to find something to do, we kept missing our apartment.
My boyfriend was working a job, and we were both paying rent.
We didn`t know if we would ever be able be able make ends meet, and as my life grew more and more isolated, I grew worried.
We tried talking to some friends about moving, but most of them weren` t interested.
They were more worried about my baby and our future than I was.
We called my roommate about moving.
He agreed, but only after he’d moved into a place where we could all hang out and have dinner, even if we couldn` t afford to rent a place.
It was a struggle to find somewhere to stay that didn` t involve my boyfriend with his baby.
I tried calling every hotel and motels in the city.
We even went to a couple of bars in Brooklyn and talked to some of the bartenders.
But none of them were interested.
I figured I’d just have to move to another city.
It took a while for me to get used to it, but eventually I started making friends, and eventually I found a place that fit me.
At first, I just lived in the apartment with my new roommate